Saturday, October 23, 2021

Supercut: The Best and Worst Christmas Letters from ‘Real Housewives’

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If you’re a fan of “Real Housewives” and simply want to add a little “spice” to your holiday greeting card this year, we’ve got you covered. Ahead, our top five standout “Real Housewives” made memorable cameos of the best gifts, including a replica of “Real Housewives” pajamas, lip service to one of our worst foes, and an important “too early” endorsement of lip service.

New on the scene in “the days of yore” is one Mr. Too Delicate (Kelly Bensimon) by way of Versailles. This gem is definitely designed for the woman in your life who needs a subtle play on Queen Elizabeth, so go ahead and order her a classy silk velvet number with Kelly Jordan stripes that are encrusted with rhinestones. Just wait for all the people in her life to start complaining, “Is this all you can come up with Kelly? You’re not doing it for me…”

A thousand and one times, you couldn’t get better than the Long Island-native to go to visit with you! First, why not pop in for breakfast on the oat cookie crumb muffin with soy milk? To say your friend would be on top of the world is putting it mildly, so go ahead and order her a tasteful crepe-filled crepe brunch plate (does every plate need to be topped with crepes?) with beautiful wood tone turkey and cranberry sauce leaves as garnish. Unless it’s too early to be buying a hostess gift, that is, then a well-worn roasting bacon is more than adequate.

Never say never (literally) when it comes to “Queer Eye” alums Jonathan Van Ness, Karamo Brown, Tan France, Antoni Porowski, and Bobby Berk, whose clothing line will have you looking like you know what you’re doing. “Housewives” fans beware, you will undoubtedly find a red velvet dress in your stocking. Follow alongside America’s cutest uncle straight onto the merchurizing juggernaut as he launches his time-sharing line, giving his opening lines… “First of all, I love men and women… same attention to detail, just different colors. That means you get to enjoy the best of both worlds…” Heh.

The cast of “Real Housewives” is constantly surrounded by scandal, so there’s no reason to feel left out when it comes to product placement. Luckily, “Real Housewives” viewers are spoiled by far. Across different seasons, we’ve seen alums of “The Real Housewives of New Jersey,” “The Real Housewives of Atlanta,” “Real Housewives of Orange County,” “Real Housewives of Beverly Hills,” “Real Housewives of New York City,” “The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills,” “The Real Housewives of Atlanta,” “The Real Housewives of Miami,” “The Real Housewives of New York City,” “The Real Housewives of New Jersey,” “The Real Housewives of New York City,” “The Real Housewives of New Jersey,” “The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills,” “The Real Housewives of Dallas,” “The Real Housewives of New York City,” “The Real Housewives of Orange County,” “The Real Housewives of New Jersey,” “The Real Housewives of New York City,” “The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills,” “The Real Housewives of New Jersey,” “The Real Housewives of Dallas,” “The Real Housewives of New York City,” “The Real Housewives of Orange County,” “The Real Housewives of Dallas” and “The Real Housewives of New Jersey.”

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